Hold That Door!

Dance Marathon is TONIGHT!! Can you believe it? The Morale Team and I have been preparing for months and it's finally here! Excitement!

As excited as I am, I'm not going to talk about Dance Marathon just yet. I want to go, experience the fun, and come back to tell you all how it went down in great detail. You know you're stoked. But what I want to talk about today was inspired by Dance Marathon.

My team within the Morale Team is running a 3 hour segment of the show (3-6am YES!). This means that for those three hours, we are in charge of entertainment, music selection, games, etc. One of the games we chose to play is a Clemson version of Family Feud. Cute, right?

So, if you're familiar with Family Feud at all, you know that they survey 100 people, take their answers to random/weird questions, and make the contestants try to guess the top answers. So we surveyed--mostly science lectures--with our random questions and tallied up their answers. What do people wear everyday besides clothes? Jewelry. What are Clemson professor's pet peeves? Tardiness. What tells the time in your house besides a clock? Sundial.... yeah, sundial was the legit top response. I don't know what people were thinking. We also had one Einstein write 'bird'. If any of you can tell the time with a bird, I'd be interested to learn.

But the answer that I found most interesting was to the question: Something a picky girl finds wrong with her date?

Top Answer: Doesn't hold the door open for her.

This surprised me. Don't get me wrong, door-holding is important. It shows manners and courtesy and just makes me feel ladylike. But the top answer? Over clothes and hair? Really? I guess I just never realized how much emphasis we put on holding the door open.

We do need to take into account that this is the South. I've heard all the jokes, read the discussion boards, and as much as Northerners will try to deny it, the consensus seems to be that we Southerners are in general a politer bunch. Less straightforward, sure, and a heck of a lot more gossipy, but we've got ready-for-grandma manners out the wazoo.

So the fact that I go to a southern school chock-full of never-seen-snow-confederate-grandbabies probably affected the answer. But it did make me think about how much it means to me whether or not a man holds the door (or anybody, really. If you're walking in front of me and you let the door swing in my face, you are immediately on my shit-list). I went to camp my junior year of high school, where one of the counselors told us young ladies something we should live our lives by: If a man doesn't hold the door open for you, automatically check him off the 'possible husband' list. I found it a little extreme at the time, but I do find myself muttering 'jackass' under my breath and glaring at anybody who doesn't hold the door open. It's not hard! And it's just polite. At least, I thought it was polite until I found this little gem while researching:

Still, whether they're checking out our asses or not, it is apparently very important to women that their date holds the door open for them. So, gentlemen, if you want to impress your gal, here is a website that goes in depth into the intricacies of holding the door open. Enjoy, and don't let her know you're looking at her booty!

In other news, I have met a boy who holds the door...and buys me sandwiches and cookies without me asking...and says I have beautiful eyes...I pretty much want to scream into a pillow--and not the angry kind of screaming. The good kind. I'm not going to read too much into it though. I'm not. He seems like a bit of a flirt, so he probably doesn't mean anything by it. But it's always nice to hear you have beautiful eyes :)

For those of you keeping score at home, this isn't K, or should I say, Creepy K. This is...Rockstar. Let's call him Rockstar.

I am listening to Everybody Loves Me by OneRepublic.

I Want Yerr Booty!

I overheard the best conversation last night. My roommates and I were sitting in our living room, me writing a paper, Whitney watching videos on Youtube, and Julia studying. Apparently some drunk fellas decided to camp outside our door for a bit of a heart to heart. Two words, people: Thin. Walls. We could hear every word. Most of it was the usual stuff you'd expect: girls they'd bang, their gym routines, how they never called their parents (lookout, badasses) and how much they'd drunk that night. But then, oh but then.

Guy #1: "I really wanna get with this girl, but she keeps playing hard to get. I can tell she likes me though-"

Guy #2: "Duuudde, I totally know what you should do! Text her like a pirate!"

Guy #1: "What?"

Guy #2: "Yeah! It works, trust me. Just be all like, 'Ahoy there matey, I want yerr booty' and then they're all like, 'Aye Aye, Captain' and you're totally in. And then if she get's offended just say you meant treasure, not her ass. Works every time."

Guy #1: "Really? It works?"

Guy #2: "Yup. That's how Meghan and I started hooking up. Pirate talk totally turns her on."

Guy #1: "Dude..."

So there you go. If a guy starts texting you like a pirate, be wary, cause apparently it's a trap. If you want to text like a pirate, here's a link. I must say, pirates are kind of dirty! If a guy texts WTTMM? Just say no.

In other news, I have a Boy Problem. There is a boy in my english class, let's call him K. K and I sit next to each other and partner up whenever we have pair exercises. He is friendly and has a twang and is not attractive in the slightest. We happened to walk to class together on Wednesday and chatted about Philosophy and God (Yeah, I have deep conversations, what of it?) on the way. Now, today he waited for me and walked me to class. The awkwardness that ensued went something like this:

Me: So...how'd you do on that prompt? I'm not sure I used passive voice like she wanted.
K: Yeah, it was hard.

Silence. I bite my tongue and look around desperately for something to talk about.

Me: Do you have any fun plans this weekend?
K: I'll probably go to a party tonight. What about you?
Me: No plans yet. I have a paper due so I'll have to devote at least a day to that. I haven't done any of the readings yet, the teacher is so boring! He...

I tell an anecdote about my weird teacher. K laughs.

K: Well, if you don't have any plans you should come to the party. Do you know where The Reserve is?
Me: *OH-SHIT eyes* Uh, yeah, I know where it is.
K: It'll be fun, you should come. It probably won't start til later.
Me: Haha yeah it's only 10 am now so I would assume it would start later haha
K: You should come.
Me: Haha yeah I'll see what we're doing.

Walk up stairs in silence.

Me: I have to pick up a package from the post office after this.
K: Oh, yeah. Can I ask you something?
Me: ...sure.
K: We should exchange numbers.
Me: ...okay. Was that your question?
K: *Pulls out phone* What's your number?

Does anyone else see that this is awkward? That it's weird? I don't mind him having my number, but...we've only talked twice! This being the second time! He is sweet but sooo not my type, but I don't want to hurt his feelings. This is starting to sound like a bad YA novel, but I'm just so confused. I didn't send any signals! I didn't flirt or go out of my way to talk to him or do anything other than be nice! Is that all it takes? Being nice? If so then I should have a hell of a lot more suiters than I do. Cute suiters, who play sports and drive motorcycles. Why? He hasn't texted me yet. I'm unsettlingly anxious for it, like in a scary movie when you just know something is going to pop out at you. This is not how love feels.

Other than that, we had workshop today in my Structure of Fiction class where we all got into groups of four and critiqued each other's scenes. Everyone seemed to like mine for the most part, which made me happy. One of my biggest faults is that I don't take criticism well, so this class is going to force me to get over that. I'm going to polish the story up a bit and then would like to post it on here sometime soon. Beware, there be cursing, matey!

I am listening to a cover of When I Grow Up by Mayday Parade.